Why Showing Up Online Feels So Hard (and How to Find Your Confidence Again)
It’s easy to assume that showing up online should come naturally.
You love what you do. You believe in your calling. And you want to share that passion with the world — especially when you know your words could comfort, inspire, or help someone heal.
But when it’s time to actually post?
You freeze.
You start overanalyzing every word, image, or idea until it feels safer to do nothing at all.
And underneath that hesitation, there’s usually one quiet thought:
“Who am I to post this?”
If you’ve ever felt that, you’re not alone. In fact, most of the women I work with — Christian therapists, mental health coaches, and small business owners with big hearts — feel that exact same way.
They want to show up confidently online, but something keeps getting in the way.
Let’s talk about why that happens — and how to start rebuilding confidence from the inside out.
1. You’re not afraid of posting — you’re afraid of being seen
When you create from the heart, content doesn’t just feel like a post. It feels like exposure.
It’s not just, “What if they don’t like my content?”
It’s, “What if they don’t like me?”
That fear can make even simple things — like writing a caption or filming a reel — feel paralyzing.
But here’s the truth: feeling vulnerable doesn’t mean you’re doing it wrong. It means you’re sharing something real.
You don’t have to show up as the perfectly put-together expert. You just need to show up as someone who understands what it feels like to struggle and still choose to keep going.
2. You don’t need to sound like everyone else
Sometimes we avoid posting because we think we have to sound “professional” or “strategic.” But if your content starts to sound like someone else’s voice, you’ll always feel disconnected from it.
Your audience doesn’t want the perfect expert — they want the honest human.
Instead of forcing polished content, try focusing on what I call the 4 H’s: the four things your audience most wants to experience:
Heard – “You get me.”
Helped – “That’s actually useful.”
Healed – “That truth hit home.”
Humored – “Finally, someone who doesn’t take this too seriously.”
If your posts cycle through those four feelings — empathy, practicality, encouragement, and lightheartedness — you’ll naturally build connection and consistency without forcing it.
P.S. I first learned about this from Shannon McKinstrie on Instagram @ShannonMcKinstrie. I LOVED her reel that talked about this (it’s different than what I mentioned above since I tweaked the idea to fit my personality and business) and you can watch it here. She also had some great tools to help you get started with this idea!
3. Consistency grows from clarity, not pressure
Most creators assume that the key to growing online is posting more.
But true consistency doesn’t come from pushing harder — it comes from making your content easier to create and easier to care about.
Try setting a simple rhythm. One that cycles through the 4-H’s. That’s it.
Maybe you post once a week, cycling through the themes you want to use to connect with your audience. Or, maybe you post five days week. Whatever your rhythm is, keep it simple and sustainable.
4. You don’t have to “find your niche” before finding yourself
If you’ve been through a season of stress, loss, or burnout, it’s completely normal to feel disconnected from your creativity. Maybe you’ve forgotten what you love. Maybe your personality has been buried under survival mode. You don’t need to reinvent yourself — you just need to remember yourself.
Start small. Ask yourself:
What small joys still make me smile?
What do I reach for when I need peace?
What do I wish someone had told me when I was starting out?
Those simple answers hold the truest version of your brand voice. And those are the things you can pull into your content and that will make you stand-out to your audience. Why? Because they are part of the real you.
And that is the person your audience wants to hear from.
5. Create a shareable account, not just shareable content
The goal isn’t to go viral — it’s to create a space that feels like home to the people you serve.
When someone scrolls your feed and thinks, “She gets it,” they don’t need to be impressed — they just need to feel seen. (This is an idea I first learned from Kelly on Instagram @Walk_Like_Warriors and I absolutely loved it! She explains it beautifully in this reel!)
That’s what makes your account worth sharing: the comfort of realness, the reminder of grace, and the quiet permission to be human again.
You don’t have to post perfectly.
You just have to keep showing up with honesty, kindness, and curiosity.
If you can create content that helps others feel heard, helped, healed, and humored — you’ll not only grow your platform, you’ll grow your peace in the process.
If this resonated with you, I’d love to hear from you! Come say hi over on Instagram — I’m always up for chatting about how your business is doing and what’s been on your heart lately. Find me @RiseAndShineVirtual
💛 Hop into my DMs and tell me a little about you, your work, and what season you’re in. I’d love to cheer you on, connect, and get to know the person behind the business.
The information shared in this blog is for general educational and inspirational purposes only. It should not be considered professional, legal, or clinical advice. Always consult the appropriate licensed or qualified professional regarding any specific questions about your business, mental health, or client care. Rise & Shine Virtual provides administrative and marketing support services, not therapy, supervision, or medical consultation.